“Whatever attitudes we habitually use toward ourselves, we will use on others, and whatever attitudes we habitually use toward others, we will use on ourselves.” – Henepola Gunaratana
When we cultivate kindness, patience, and understanding within ourselves, these same qualities naturally extend to our interactions with others. Similarly, when we practice compassion and empathy toward those around us, we foster a more nurturing and accepting relationship with ourselves. By paying attention to our habitual attitudes and inner monologue, we can create a positive feedback loop to replace negative self-talk with lovingkindness. We can also examine our interactions with others to see what encouraging and supportive language we use with family and friends.
Often our comments towards others are far less critical than our comments to ourselves. The next time we find ourselves in the midst of negative self talk, we can hit the pause button and ask ourselves, “would we say this same thing to a friend?” If we wouldn’t talk to a friend, parent, partner, or child this way, then it’s a good sign we should re-write the narrative.
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